Sunday, December 18, 2016
Tuesday, December 13, 2016
Okay, okay, okay, as mentioned hither too, I am currently watching "Suicide Squad". Why? Because a friend of mine informed me that it wasn't as bad as I believed it was. Now, granted, I've been saying the very prospect of a Suicide Squad movie was unearned, ridiculous and reeked of absolute desperation, but to be completely fair, I did give "Twilight" a shot and how awful would I be if I didn't at the VERY LEAST give an unearned, stupid looking DC property the same chance I'd give "Twilight", pretty freakin' awful. So I conceded and decided to watch "Suicide Squad". To start off my current reservations with the movie are simple. For starters the Suicide Squad in and of it's self as a concept that ONLY works in comic books and BARELY (if, that).
It's just a team of anti-heroes (more or less) who got some shine and notoriety for being slightly interesting enough to put in a group to help save the world in order to get their sentenced reduced. Hence the rotating door of members we've seen in recent years. Second, I hate Floyd Lawton. I hate Floyd Lawton with a passion. Ever since I've seen him in "Villains United" I've always hated that douche. He's just over all unlikable and I saw nothing redeeming about him (and please bare in mind that this is a group that featured a random Parademon as a member and yet Floyd was the most loathsome one of the bunch...dwell on that for a spell) by the time the book ended I was hoping he'd be revealed as a traitor so Catman or Deathstroke could put two (bullets) in his noggin and make him go the way of Uncle Ben (mixing companies, I know).
Third and my biggest issue with the movie is that this will unfortunately be the 1st live action Harley Quinn and it's not even Harley Quinn. This is not a slight on Margot Robbie, I've never seen her work, I know nothing about her, she's pretty but ultimately that's all I know, Harley Quinn is a character I do know, EXTREMELY well. Well enough to know that whoever the f*ck this is:
is not Harley Quinn. Sadly, this is the Harley Quinn from The (misbegotten) New 52...a DC Reboot which turned the vast majority of all their characters into diet Batman versions of their original selves. Everyone got darker and grittier updates and costumes, Starfire become a whore, Beastboy turned red, Huntress & The Flash somehow become Black, Superman boned Wonder Woman, good times...(I'm being PAINFULLY sarcastic) and then along came this new Harley Quinn (whom I've dubbed Whorely Quinn) and this took the piss right out of me.
Harley was a fun character, she was cute, genuinely funny and while yeah, she's completely and utterly psychotic and a criminal, she's also extremely nice and easy going. Not given to rage and even willing to look on the bright side of things. This is a chick who took baby presents to Black Canary when she found out she was pregnant, who shared an apartment with Holly Robinson at the end of (that godawful series that was) Countdown during the time where she tried to turn her life around, who dropped a dime on The New Scarface's crime ONLY because the original Scarface (Arnold Wesker) was actually kind to her in Arkham. Whorely Quinn is a slut who pleases truckers for 2 dollars while they eat their cheese burger. Harley Quinn was never a hardcore murderer. Even Batman realizes that Harley isn't a serious threat and can more or less reason with her (which he has, often!)
Long winded story aside, I find Whorely Quinn to be completely distasteful and an EXTREMELY poor representation of the character and unfortunately THIS will be the character that people will remember as mainstream and that sickens me. With all of that preamble out of the way, I decided to make this a real time review in order to avoid ranting posts on Facebook. So if you do watch the "Suicide Squad", you'll be able to following along and see how I feel about this movie every step of the way. And with all that being said, let's dive in
THE FOLLOWING REVIEW TAKES PLACES BETWEEN 4:00PM & 5:00PM, POSTS OCCUR IN REAL TIME
Thursday, December 8, 2016
People characterizes Kylo Ren as whiny mostly because Adam Driver (the actor who plays Ren) is young (32 years old), has a baby face, and because he shouts a lot. Shouting is a declaration of either anger or fear, Kylo Ren didn't appear to be afraid of anything really so I'm gonna go with anger. Also towards the end of the film, people claim that Rey (an untrained soon to be Jedi) managed to best Kylo Ren. Any honest re-watching of that fight would show that Rey spend the majority of the fight running from Kylo Ren and trying to block his attacks. By the end of the film, Rey finally decided to mount an offensive and even then it really wasn't much of an offensive, she used Kylo Ren's anger against him by finding his openings and throwing him off balance. Anyways, ramblings asides, this article is made to prove with 5 simple points how Kylo Ren is better than Darth Vader. These aren't opinionated points, these are objective reasons based on the movies and the various implications of certain characters actions.